M.S.F.W.(t.t.h.)

My
Sure
Fire
Way
To
Total
Humiliation

Actually, that's not what the letters stand for. They stand for, Minnesota Speculative Fiction Writers. (I added the t.t.h. myself.) Tonight, unless something happens to prevent it, I will be attending my first ever meeting. It's a milestone event, although I'll be the only one there who will be aware of it. You see, Bevie's afraid.

Bevie also has a ludicrous - but very vivid - imagination. This could be a wonderful experience:

MSFW Regular #1: Say, who is that cool person who just came in?

MSFW Regular #2: Don't you know? Why that's Bevie James.

R#1: Bevie James! Here? You're kidding. Oh, I have to have an autograph!

R#2: You'll have to fight through the crowd.

R#1: I can do it. After all, I am the group president. Oh, Bevie! Oh, Bevie! Will you be reading any of your wonderful works tonight? Please say yes!

Bevie: Why, yes. I suppose I could spare a moment or two. I have a couple of tombs here.

R#2: May I get you something to drink, Bevie?

Bevie: Why thank you.

R#2: It's Pepsi - 2008.

Bevie: Excellent year.

Or, it could be the exact opposite.

R#1: Who in the h*ll is that?

R#2: Not sure. Signed in as Baggy James, or something.

R#1: James? James? Wasn't that the name of the idiot who signed up last July and then never attended any meetings?

R#2: Yeah, I believe it was. You don't suppose this is that fool?

R#1: Could be. Have Boris stand ready. If this Baggy person is as as useless as I suspect, Boris can have some fun.

R#2: Right! He'll like that. Should I let him use the lotion?

R#1: Sure. He deserves his treats.

My friends would probably assure me neither of these possiblities are really possibilities. I'm not so sure. Meeting people can be very scarey. Two more hours and I have to leave, assuming Spouse gets home with the car, and assuming the meeting isn't cancelled. (We have a Winter Weather Advisory for Central Minnesota - snow, blowing snow and wind-chills down to -35.) Hmm. The truth sounds more threatening than fiction.

I'm thinking about bringing my stuffed monkey, Tomoko. I got her at the Minnesota Zoo last summer. She sits by my computer and stares at me. Better not. Just in case the second scenario proves true.

The clock continues to tick.