Back in the Sixties someone came up with a bumper sticker which read: Life Sucks. And then you die.
Sometimes I think they weren't half wrong.
Once again I was temporarily without my email account. Sometimes I think technology was invented to drive me nuts. It certainly has speeded things up. A long time ago it would have taken a lot longer for me to get this close to the bottom.
Fortunately, my email is working again and so I am not cut off from sanity and joy. I don't talk with people face-to-face much anymore. Haven't for years. So having online people to talk with is my only real interaction with the world at large.
Listening to Richard Harris singing MacArthur Park. What a beautiful song. Wish I could sing that. Sing it well, I mean.
Anyway, I'm not dead. Not yet. Plenty of time for that. Meanwhile, I'm kind of in limbo. I'm here where I have to be because there is no place I want to be that I can be. Did you follow that? Being a person of inspiration I am waiting. Halfheartedly, I attempt various things, but in truth I am waiting for the sign, the indicator, of what to do next. Until then I am frozen in a prison of my own making, waiting for the Keymaster to present me with instructions on what to do, where to go, and how to achieve. Better people keep moving. But I am not better. I am waiting, and like the obedient child I once was I look for what I do not know.
Perfect song. Aerosmith's, Dream On, just began. Catch you later.
7 comments:
That, my friend, sounds like the voice of depression. (I know from personal experience.) I think that you'd be more able to feel inspiration if you made yourself get up and do something--anything at all! It'll clear your mind and spirit, too (or at least help.)
Take care of yourself, and I'm glad you have internet access back again!
Kind of back. I went offline for a bit and it's taken three reboots before I could get back online. And it is running S-L-O-O-O-W-W-L-Y.
Writtenwyrdd makes a good point, Bevie.
I hope your internet stays up. Mine is slow today but not S-L-O-W.
Thanks
Glad you're back no matter what!
I've been wiped out by depression many times and I know there's no easy way to climb back out of the black hole. But, the gloom you're in right now is situational--Time will take care of the situation so you can move on. In the meantime, please keep on writing.
Getting worried about you, Bevie. Sounds like you've got the weight of the world on your shoulders.
No need for worry. Life goes on, albeit often takes side roads we'd rather not travel.
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