Monday, May 25, 2009

A Bully's Reformation

When I was young there was a place about two miles away where we would go to swim. It was in a small creek which ran under Country Road 22. At its deepest it might have been three feet.

We would bike up there, park our bicycles, and jump in. It was fun to float under the bridge when cars were going over. No skinny dipping, though. Not here. That was done someplace else.

This was also a place where some would go fishing - when there were no swimmers present. Tommy and I went fishing there more than once. Actually caught something. Once. Then Tommy got mad at me because I said I wouldn't eat the fish. Not that I'm against eating animals. On the contrary. No. What I was (and still am) against is fighting with bones to eat. And that's what fresh water fish means to me.

There were these two older boys. They thought they were toughs. We just thought they were creeps. If they were so tough, why did it take two of them to beat up on any one single person? They never fought alone. And they never threatened groups. What they did was isolate one person from the group, and then demonstrate their toughness. The isolated person would never get help. Kind of like adult politics, isn't it?

Anyway, these two idiots (and why was it that the so-called toughs could never get a grade above "D") came down to the waterhole one day to fish. Wish spears. This ought to be interesting, I thought.

Joe, the dominant one, took his trident and went wading out into the water, downstream of the bridge where the creek poured into a swamp. We all watched with anticipation as he hunted his fish.

Suddenly, Joe stopped.

I see something! It's moving on the bottom.

Tommy was excited. I shook my head, but there was no point in saying anything. Joe never listened to anybody. Joe struck.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Tommy looked at me.

Did the fish bite him?

I shook my head.

No. The idiot just speared his own foot.

Sure enough, Joe was limping out of the creek. Doug rushed to help him while the rest of us laughed. (Hey, if you had been there you would have laughed, too.) In true friendship form, Doug was very concerned over Joe's injury, which wasn't bad. Water bends light and Joe had no comprehension about that, so he aimed at where he thought the prey was. The result was he only caught the side of his foot enough to make it bleed. There was no serious damage. Yes, Doug was concerned, but he was also too dense to put together all that had just taken place.

Why'd you do that Joe? Huh? Why'd you spear your own foot?

We all fell off the bridge laughing. Tommy went and retrieved the spear and set it on the shore where Joe, or Doug, could retrieve it later. Then we all returned to our swimming.

Oddly enough, Joe ceased to be a bully after that. Not only that, but he wasn't quite so stupid anymore either. Doug, on the other hand, while stopping his bully tactics (couldn't do it on his own) never developed any kind of smarts like Joe did.

You know, sometimes when you leave a bully to his own devices he will teach himself a lesson he will never forget. It worked with Joe. Wish it worked that way with all bullies.

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